Wastin' Away Press
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"To entertain, inspire, frighten, teach, and entice as many readers as possible." - Keith Helinski



Wastin' Away Press features Keith Helinski's writings, ranging from short stories online to movie reviews over the years. Also features an assortment of Keith's interests. If you like what you see, check out Wastin' Away Press's official Facebook.

Hellplex Raise Your Glass Snowpocalypse Now Seating... Wastin' Away Emotions MovieFreak That Day Livin' the Dream it's More like a Nightmare! The Vanguard

   Ask me anything   Ponder
June 19, 2013
"If Norm ever gets caught, he will top them both. He will be the most infamous out there. Movie titles like: Hellplex, Movie Theater with 1000 Corpses, or The Michigan Movie Theater Massacre will emerge. His legacy will be well known. People, who have visited this family/joyful movie theater over the years, will be shocked. Many will need therapy until the day they croak. Interviews from family and friends with the stereotypical, “I would have never guessed, not him. He always seemed normal,” will flood the local (and perhaps, national) news for weeks/months/and years on end. Police will search the theater disgusted by the quantities of remains they will find. The commute will never be the same. The EYS jingle will be infamous, like that cute Lizzie Borden rhyme you can jump rope to!"

—

Now Seating…

***

I’ve started to drop little hints of what happens to the joyful EYS theater, and to Norm, in \m/. I already got ideas of possible references in future stories in the coming years ahead, which will lead to the follow-up of ‘Now Seating…’

I am not ready to write that story just yet…

1:50am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnhKIkf
Filed under: quotes Now Seating... \m/ rock on Amazon 
June 16, 2013
"

I had toyed with the idea of reediting this story based on some of the criticisms this story attracted, but in truth, and perhaps this might sound lazy, but I really can’t think of anything else I could do with it to expand or to fix. I like it the way it is. It’s not a perfect story. But I am proud of it nonetheless, and I’d like to preserve what I thought/felt/and wrote two years ago. You compare this story to Now Seating…, Emotions, and even the story I am currently working on, you will notice how much I’ve improved. That’s the real reason why I don’t wish to fix or change anything from this story.

When I first published this piece on Amazon, I had paired Wastin’ Away with Journeyman (a story you could read in the Livin’ the Dream…short story collection on Amazon). I thought it would be a good pairing. I guess some double-features don’t blend well together. So I decided to take that story out, and add a very short story called Tranquility, which is meant to be a prequel to Wastin’ Away. I was fascinated with how Jimmy Buffett created Margaritaville. Eventually, I intend to write a third Wastin’ Away story.

I also added a preview here of my current writing project I am working on called \m/, which I hope to be done with by the end of this summer.

"

—

Wastin’ Away

10:23pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnWk68W
Filed under: quotes livin' the dream Wastin' Away Amazon Journeyman Margaritaville jimmy buffett tranquility Now Seating... emotions \m/ rock on 
June 15, 2013
"

So while many may critique Wastin’ Away for their own self-righteous reasons, just know, this piece was a stepping-stone for me. It was a self-taught lesson in writing. There are things I like about it. There are things I don’t like. Hey, at least I am not being pretentious about it! I know it’s not the best story ever conceived (in fact, I would rate it 3.0 if I read it for the first time).

Let’s be honest, though, does any of Jimmy Buffett’s songs have real depth or substance? When you go to Margaritaville, do you ever go there to ponder about life? It’s an escape, plain and simple. I wanted to blend the escapism Buffett had harnessed so perfectly well with his Margaritaville empire, and the realities of working at a restaurant, all day - every day, and create a mix drink of some kind. That may not make a very compelling story on your way to Key West while reading on your Kindle during your flight, but that’s the difference between the tales of fiction-land a lot of authors pull out of their asses when they write Buffett rehashes, and the reality of everyday going on’s at Margaritaville.

"

—

Wastin’ Away

4:45am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnNoXSu
Filed under: quotes Wastin' Away Amazon jimmy buffett Margaritaville 
June 14, 2013
"

For me personally, I can’t say it is my favorite piece, or even my best. I wrote it after writing Hellplex. I wanted to write something ambitious (at the time), that was completely different from Hellplex. I also wanted to escape to a warm place. Took me two sleepless nights to write the (at the time) 8,000+ word story. Friends/family seemed to really dig Wastin’ Away when I posted it on my Facebook. So I then got the cocky idea of publishing it online. It went through quite a few revisions (and trimmings) between the time I wrote it (February) to the time I published it on Amazon (July) in 2011. It did very well for a while. Was the first story I’ve ever written that I profited from. A big thank you to everyone who bought a copy, and to Amazon for giving little pesky amateur writers like me, an opportunity to get published! Because of how well the story was selling at the time, I based my Tumblr/Facebook page(s), showcasing all my writings, around the Wastin’ Away name.

Since then, I’ve tackled an assortment of various writing projects. I like to jump around (same applies to my reading). Some stories I’ve written are horror related. Other stories align with that ‘livin’ the dream’ mentality I went for with Wastin’ Away. That’s ultimately what I want to be known for: a versatile writer.

"

—

Wastin’ Away

4:05am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnJ93Cz
Filed under: quotes Wastin' Away Amazon writing livin' the dream hellplex 
June 13, 2013
"If there is one thing I will be known for, I think the byline, ‘the mediocre writer of Wastin’ Away,’ will sum it up! For the record, I wasn’t expecting this piece to be a hot-seller, anyhow. There are too many Jimmy Buffett knock off’s out there, usually of the same topic. That bores me. I was interested in what it would be like to work at the original Margaritaville in Key West, Fl. And that’s how Wastin’ Away started."

—

Wastin’ Away

4:27am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnEUu19
Filed under: quotes Wastin' Away Amazon 
June 12, 2013
Wastin' Away

Wastin’ Away: Keith Helinski: Amazon.com: Books

For the past six months, I had played with the idea of re-editing ‘Wastin’ Away.’ Each time I took a look at it, I just couldn’t do it. I am not going to tell you that I think ‘Wastin’ Away’ is a great story. I am probably more hard on it than the harsh reviewers that knocked it down.

But truth of the matter, I just couldn’t think of anything to change or add. I wrote this beast two years ago. Since that time, I’ve written other stories. I like ‘Wastin’ Away’ just the way it is. It’s not perfect. It doesn’t have to be. I’d also like to preserve it, for it’s nice to see how far I’ve improved since this piece.

I still wanted to do something special here, since it is two years old! So I’ve written a brand spakin’ new afterword for ‘Wastin’ Away,’ took out ‘Journeyman,’ (since reviewers were complaining the two stories didn’t flow well together), added ‘Tranquility,’ and a preview of \m/.

That’s not the best news. For the next five days - ‘Wastin’ Away’ is FREE!

Enjoy!

11:50am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxnAosYM
Filed under: links Amazon Wastin' Away tranquility \m/ rock on 
May 23, 2013
MovieFreak

MovieFreak SPECIAL EDITION! - Kindle edition by Keith Helinski, Dennis Landmann. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading MovieFreak SPECIAL EDITION!.
Updated with two new reviews (Star Trek Into Darkness/Iron Man 3), and a preview of \m/.

While I’m in the middle of my \m/ project, I do intend on writing a few more MovieFreak related pieces this summer (including an inevitable review of ‘Man of Steel,’ and I’d like to write a ‘Walking Dead’ related piece). I also like to write pieces/features on ‘Perks of Being a Wallflower,’ Harry Potter, Redlettermedia.com, my NoDQ days, and ‘Dexter’ at some point this year.

Lots of plans, lots to write! 8-)

1:15am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxldbyGV
Filed under: links moviefreak Amazon 
May 22, 2013
"Norm had a joy killing and dismembering Loomis, Dexter Morgan-style; he also had joy hiding the bits and pieces through out the entire theater. Most of Loomis’s body parts were in the theater seat 148, top row in theater 10. The same one that young girl was, at this very moment, seated in. If only she knew! If only most people knew the bodies they were sitting on through out the entire theater. But they did not, as all the body parts were covered in enough chloroform that the smell of rotted body parts never surfaced. Do not forget the fact that the popcorn smell invades the entire theater."

— Now Seating…

10:51pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxld2rsf
Filed under: quotes Now Seating... it's more like a nightmare Amazon dexter Darkly Dreaming Dexter 
May 22, 2013
"I get into the building with no greeter. No customers. No co-workers. No people at all. It was deserted. I walk through center aisle and I notice some noise from the meat department to my right. I head over there through aisle seven and I witnessed something disturbing. One female customer was munching into another female customer’s stomach on the ground, as if there was a KFC platter dish right in front of them. The blood, intestines, guts pouring out of this poor woman made me sick to my stomach with the yummy taste of vomit in my mouth. And that scent. My god, that aroma is unbearable. Imagine salt, vomit, scat, and left over chicken from last month all mixed together in a blender. Not pleasant to be around."

— Routine Nightmare

12:56am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxlYrBuc
Filed under: quotes zombies routine nightmare it's more like a nightmare Amazon 
May 21, 2013
...it's More like a Nightmare!...free for FIVE DAYS!

…it’s More like a Nightmare!: Keith Helinski: Amazon.com: Kindle Store

11:51am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxlVVf-q
Filed under: Amazon links it's more like a nightmare 
May 15, 2013
"Ignoring the outrageous topic of this work of ”art”, Mr Helinski shows poor writing skills. This story lacks any sign of compassion or respect, Ms Meyer is a new writer, she did a fantastic job with the Twilight Saga. Hence the huge number of books sold worldwide, the overwhelming amount of tickets sold opening day, weekend, and throughout the run of each movie. Than there are the DVD ‘s, scores, soundtracks, jewellery, clothing, and much more merchandise. To bring the marvellous Stephen King into this is and absurd, Mr King has more respect for fellow writers. I wish Mr Helinski success in his attempt to become as writer. I hope he don’t have someone like himself to try to push him down. I found that most people that knows about Twilight either loves it or hates it, so why must these naysayers waste time on Twilight?"

—

S. Thompson; wonderfully written ‘RAISE YOUR GLASS’ review via Amazon

***

A LOL review I just had to reply to. :p

4:13am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxl18lju
Filed under: quotes Raise your glass twilight Amazon 
May 13, 2013
"It was kind of interesting, actually.
I liked how he mentioned bestiality and necrophilia- people often forget these two. :D at the same time, I kind of felt that the whole “I’ve never read a single page but trust me, it sucks” is kind of overdone. I dunno, maybe it’s because I actually like the books(but it ISN’T my favorite series and I’m not going to act offended, because I’m not. Plenty of people don’t like Twilight.). This isn’t really a parody, either. All in all, it was pretty okay, though. For all religious Twilight fans- don’t read this, you’ll only upset yourself."

— lauren; ‘RAISE YOUR GLASS’ review via Amazon

5:51pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxkwGZ-8
(Notes: 1)
  
Filed under: quotes Amazon twilight Raise your glass 
May 12, 2013
"Raise Your Glass is what it is and makes no pretentious claims otherwise. I am a Twilight Saga fan, and I thought this was humurous. I don’t know why people take it so seriously. Like one reviewer who said, everyone is entitled to their opinion but you have no right to criticise….? Huh?"

— Kat Laytham; ‘RAISE YOUR GLASS’ review via Amazon

11:45am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxkpzSv2
Filed under: quotes Raise your glass twilight Amazon 
May 10, 2013
"Very graphic parody, not something I would read no matter the topic it had. Story of the young man in line was mildly amusing."

—

 cameljaque; ‘RAISE YOUR GLASS’ review via Amazon.


***

And the Twilight series isn’t high school spew? Hmmm….

1:09pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZiaSOxkg3njK
Filed under: quotes Raise your glass twilight Amazon 
May 5, 2013
"

I have found tranquility in Key West. I love the simplicity of being out in the sun all day without a care in the world: just relaxing. And I love my job! The sea scent gets me every time. The silly tourists get me every time. The Beach Boys in the background gets me every time. And Lynn. My beautiful Lynn. She gets me every time. I am the luckiest guy in the world!

Truth is, I’d rather be wastin’ away here, than anywhere else in the world! When I am acquainted with people and they ask me (like clockwork) how I am doing, I’d always say, “livin’ the dream.” 99.9 percent of the time, they laugh. But I mean it. How many people on this rotating rock can say that with a straight face and mean it? Can you?

"

—

Wastin’ Away

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Filed under: quotes Wastin' Away Amazon 
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